Friday, December 01, 2006

Bed Rest Day 64 - story time

So last night my Mom & I decided to go to this new Macy's we heard about in Queens. I wanted to look for something to wear for the holidays & I have a gift card AND a Friends & Family coupon. w00t! We get there and it appears to be still under construction - but there are signs hanging everywhere assure us they're open. Very "Clerks." We find parking underground & head inside.
There's a directory located in the underground parking (quite convenient, I might add) & see that the Misses department is located on the 8th floor. We climb on a very nice, shiny, new elevator and press the button for floor 8. The doors open upon our arrival & we notice its just a plain hallway - like an office building. We double check that we're ON floor 8 and the elevator says we are - so we get off. There's a sign - Macy's - with an arrow pointing down this long hall - we follow. There's a door with the Macy's logo on it & one of those 8th Floor signs. We figure we must've gone in some secret back way. If you've ever been shopping at the Westchester, it was very much like getting in there. So, we open the door and go in, anxious to start shopping. There is nothing there. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Its an empty room. A HUGE empty room. Basically - a floor of a department store - but empty. There seem to be some decorations hanging from the walls & ceiling and the floor is carpeted with tiled walkways all around, but no clothes. No merchandise. Not a shoe or sock or shirt in sight. WTF?
There are some workers there and they turn around and look at us when we enter. After standing there a minute looking completely confused - one comes over and confronts us.
"Can I help you?" he asks.
"We're looking for Macy's." I say.
"Oh - we're not open yet.," he answers.
"Ya think?," I thought.
He goes on to explain that only the Macy's Holiday Shoppe is open at this location right now and that's located down on the third floor. The rest of the new Macy's won't be open until after the new year.
He offers to escort us down there, but we decline & decide to give up & go home. I'm tired, I'm hungry and I'm disappointed. The nice man walks us to the elevator and back down we go to the parking garage. We get in the car and start home.
Traffic. Great. Love it. We're NOT moving. Not even inching forward at this point.
One of NY's finest is walking down through the line of cars and an irate motorist asks him what's going on. Like a good NYPD officer, he ignores this question stating the situation is "under control" which is code for "all hell is breaking loose up there." A pedestrian/homeless man educates us on the situation: Apparently, about a mile ahead, there's been a bit of a road rage incident. From what I could understand - seeing as I don't speak homeless which apparently is a language all its own - the situation ahead involved an SUV, a baseball bat & a lot of broken glass. Great.
So, now we're moving - being diverted down some seedy side street towards the Queensboro bridge. Finally we're getting somewhere!
Silly Maggie - its NY. There's construction, of course. We're moving, but not very fast.
I see an empty lane & I take it - not realizing this lane does NOT go to the bridge, but rather INTO the construction site. Great. I'm stuck now. How the HELL am I going to get out of here?
Then...all of a sudden...BAM! The dark road I'm on ends and the front end of my car is stuck in a huge pile of boulders! I can't get out. I try reversing, but my car won't budge.
So now, my mom & I are literally stuck in a dark construction site in Queens and there is NO ONE around.
I take out my cell phone to call 911 and then, as if the night couldn't get any more weird....
Corey's alarm goes off & wakes me up.
Its 5 am - I'm home - no construction site - no closed Macy's.
Damn pregnancy hormones make me have some WICKED dreams, huh?

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